Portal

In a recent "BEING/Speaking of Faith ", Krista Tippett interviews NY Times Journalist Nicholas Kristof. Mr Kristof talks about how mass need paralyzes peoples' capacity to give. Tippett points to the emotional response that one specific story might create in a listener's heart a kind of "portal" for compassion. Through this portal of compassion the listener might be moved to give or to take action for change.

I connected with this notion when I thought about the two dozen the United Way rallies that I have been a part of in the last 11 weeks. And, I realized the importance of telling Just Our Story about why I personally "Live United." When we were first trained on this presentation, I wanted to share all the wonderful things that United Way is doing and describe all the terrible statistics that point to the broad and deep need in our community.

Now, having heard this small snippet about Rokia and Moussa on the interview, I understood why one personal story is more powerful. Here is a partial transcript of the full interview:

=============================

Ms. Tippett: But there's some way you put that and somewhere you said that the emotional response becomes a portal and then rational arguments like numbers can play a supporting role.

...

Mr. Kristof: That opening, that connection, that empathy, is really an emotional one. It's done based on individual stories. And we all know that there is this compassion fatigue as the number of victims increases, but what the research has shown that is kind of devastating is that the number at which we begin to show fatigue is when the number of victims reaches two.

Ms. Tippett: Right. Would you tell the story about Rokia and Moussa, the photograph that they used to illustrate this?

Mr. Kristof: Yeah. This is from the work of a psychologist called Paul Slovic. There were experiences where people were shown a photo of a starving girl from Mali called Rokia, a seven-year-old girl, and asked to contribute in various different scenarios. And then also a boy named Moussa. And essentially people would donate a lot of money. If they saw that Rokia was hungry, they wanted to help her. Likewise, when they saw a picture of Moussa, they wanted to help him. But the moment you put the two of them together and asked people to help both Rokia and Moussa, then at point donations dropped. And by the time you ask them to donate to 21 million hungry people in West Africa , you know, nobody wanted to contribute at all.

Ms. Tippett: Because they're overwhelmed by that, or it doesn't spark the same reaction that actually enables people to act.

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For me, I have wondered how God could possible contain all the world's misery. Or even all the world's joy. It's just too massive for my little heart.( That's why God's God and not me.) Perhaps this is a portal to my own understanding that might possibly apply to God - that through personal stories, personal narratives, personal sacred moments... God does Give. God does Take Action. God Cares. God Loves.

What is your portal, showing up in this moment?

So let's go outside, where Jesus is, where the action is—not trying to be privileged insiders, but taking our share in the abuse of Jesus. This "insider world" is not our home. We have our eyes peeled for the City about to come. Let's take our place outside with Jesus, no longer pouring out the sacrificial blood of animals but pouring out sacrificial praises from our lips to God in Jesus' name. Hebrews 13:13

Dishonesty and Shrewdness

My sermon from yesterday, Proper 20 Year C – Luke 16:1-13

Have you seen the TV ad for a bank with the slogan “even kids know it’s wrong”… ?

It goes like this… A market researcher asks a little girl if she would like a pony. She says, “Yes!” and he reaches in his pocket for a plastic horse. She takes it and plays with it, smiling. He asks the other girl if she would like a pony. She, of course, says “Yes!” He leans a bit to the side, clicks, and out from behind the cubicle wall walks a live pony. Both kids are wide-eyed in amazement. The camera zooms into the first girl’s face – she says, “How come I didn’t get a real pony?” and the market researcher says, “Well, you didn’t ask for one,” The narrator closes the scene with the moral of the story… “Even kids know it's wrong to hold out on somebody… "

Hearing today’s gospel,we may feel like that first girl… “even kids know its wrong” to be dishonest, especially with someone else’s accounts. Why did the master commend the dishonest manager?

I recently watched a film called The Proposal. Sandra Bullock plays Margaret, Exec Editor of a big New York publishing company. She is bossy, pushy and cold. In the opening scenes, she barks out several commands to Andrew, her mistreated assistant.He has to help her to fire the #2 manager. Then, the company president calls her to his office. He explains that her visa expired - she is being deported to Canada.

You can almost see the bubble over her head, “what shall I do, now that my master is taking the position away from me?” (But it’s a film, so you have to imagine it.)

“I have decided what to do,” she explains to her president,and calls Andrew into the office. In that moment, she forces Andrew to say they are getting married. Andrew plays along, there, (he’s used to covering up for her), but is very reluctant later, when he thinks about it. He agrees to the deal after Margaret reminds him that if she goes, he goes, since he was complicit in firing of the #2 manager earlier.

You can almost see the bubble over his head, “what shall I do, now that my master is taking the position away from me?” (again, it’s a film!)

“I have decided what to do,” he explains to her after the INS interrogation, convincing the officer that they really were getting married. He shrewdly insists that Margaret make him the editor and also publish his book. So now they are both in this for personal reasons. The plot thickens as they go to Alaska for his grandmother’s 90th birthday – and they announce their engagement. After a weekend of shenanigans, they do hold the wedding with the whole community there.

At the last minute, right before the “I do’s,” Margaret calls off the wedding. She admits her selfishness in the situation and flies back to NY for the deportation. This forces Andrew to face his own selfishness. He has to now think about how he really feels. In the last scene, he arrives in New York just in time as she is cleaning out her office. He admits his selfish ambitions and that in all of this, he forgives her and says he is actually falling in love with her. He then asks her to marry him. She admits her part, too, she forgives him and agrees to marry him. The closing credits show them snuggling and smooching happily.

Like our gospel reading, this familiar plot shows how “someone in trouble can stumble into grace practically by accident.” Although they were in this for themselves,their hearts softened as their relationship deepened with the weekend shenanigans. In several scenes, they began to see each other as human and they learned to forgive.

The dishonest manager in the parable also “stumbles into grace.” In the debt-reduction scenes, those who owe money appreciate his forgiveness and begin to see him – and the master – in a new light. They appreciate the manager and this bodes well for future job possibilities. And, by grace, it works even better than planned! The debtors get a better deal and the manager gets praise from the master! Because of his shrewdness, the master looks like a good guy. Everyone wins, and the closing credits could show them snuggling and smooching.

Well that’s just crazy! Why would someone so bad end up in such a good situation? Some of us might want the manager to pay for his dishonesty – not get out of the situation even better than he started.

What kind of moral example is this? Well, it isn’t one.

Its simply an illustration of the outrageous nature of God’s grace, and our call to live in it with forgiveness.

It sounds a bit like the story of Jacob. He was the trickster patriarch who deceived his father, cheated his brother and then made off with most of his father-in-law’s flock. God’s blessing was always available to him. Jewish folklore – which Jesus knew – is full of stories of clever and wise rascals…

The dishonest manager is praised but not for his thievery. With one folklore-ish parable, Jesus pushes his disciples and critiques the scribes and Pharisees, whose efforts alienate the very people to whom they ought to be kind. Jesus rhetorically asks, in essence, if a selfish guy can make friends in this way, with a little forgiveness… what more can he do with the grace of God behind him the whole way? What if he used this cleverness to bring about good-ness, not just to serve himself?

We have to consider, what about us? When are stressed by this dog-eat-dog world, when we get anxious about earthly things – money, status, power, the kind of phone we have, the brand of clothes we wear… what do we do? We get clever and shrewd and use our best skills for ourselves alone.

That’s the challenge in today’s message: How can we, as disciples,use our cleverness to love things bring about good-ness, not just to serve ourselves? How can we, with God’s grace, offer forgiveness, feed the poor, welcome the outcast, love each other more deeply?

The good news in today’s message is that we can, with God’s surprising grace and with acts of forgiveness.

Forgiveness is an act of discipleship, not an emotion.

Through forgiveness, Margaret and Andrew found what really mattered.
Through forgiveness,the manager gained friends and the master saved face.
Through forgiveness and by the grace of God, our relationships are deepened, our hearts are softened, and unfair systems are up-ended.

Forgiveness, the starting place for living into God’s’ dream. If God was keeping score, we’d be in debt like the folks in the parable today. With grace preceding us, we accept it and pay-it-forward with forgiveness to others. That is how to be a disciple and to create ripples of goodness into an expansive sense of God’s justice.

It is grace that fuels the engine of forgiveness that drives our journey into God’s Love.

We who receive it gladly are called to share it freely.

Amen

Cities

Scripture and religious teaching contains so many images that draw on the quiet, pastoral images.

• The shepherd who finds the one lost lamb.
• The green pastures into which I lie for restoration.
• Promises from Yahweh of living in fertile pasturelands and being God's flock.

Don't get me wrong, I think these images are timeless for humanity, in our yearning for sensing God's presence and deeply profound. AND I read recently an alternative image that Kester Brewin suggests may be a force to be reckoned with in how the Church emerges in the future.

• It's in the city where we are faced with humanity.
• It's in the city where buildings and stone and pavement tempt us to feel separated from nature.
• It's in the city where God and humanity gotta work together, in co-creation, to become temporary communities, creative exchanges of ideas and technologies and must learn to find that essential goodness in life.

For me, the "city" can become a stumbling block in my faith. Let's face it - cities are hard places to live joyfully if you, like me, tend toward nature. But removing myself from "city" to "go into nature to experience God" is, in a way, an escape. I don't deny that.

As for me, I'm going to learn to take time to listen for God in the city - where God's full and mature incarnate complexity, mixed of divinity and humanity, cooperate. "Move towards the pain," as I learned in CPE.

The City is the place where we need to be working out our corporate life. The City is the direction that Jesus moved in his ministry and where we can still find him today. I think that The Church, to survive in the next century, can take this complex dimension of *city* and serve to teach us all about finding God through complexity and through The Other.

Then we'll all retreat to lie down in green pastures to renew.

Spirituality is not to be learned in flight from the world, by fleeing from things to a place of solitude; rather we must learn to maintain an inner solitude regardless of where we are or who we are with. We must learn to penetrate things, and find God there. - Meister Eckhart

Where do you experience God in your city - in this moment?

The Invitation

Friday was our last morning report.

Nathan shared this memorable poem. It's a poem of reframing, which has been a profound lesson for me this year. Reframing from "just chatting" with someone to "providing pastoral care." Reframing from "visiting the sick" to "witnessing the suffering." Reframing from "making someone feel better" to "connecting in the other's deepest pain."

Thanks, Nathan, for sharing The Invitation:

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain!I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithlessand therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty even when it's not pretty, every day,and if you can source your own life from its presence.
The Invitation by Oriah Mountain Dreamer, book cover

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, “Yes!”

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

by Oriah Mountain Dreamer
copyright © 1999 by Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Who are you inviting in this moment?

Numbers

The inside page of Conspire! magazine, vol. 1, issue 2//summer 2009 was Dispatches From The Front.

"Acts of profligate love, reckless hope, defiant goodness, paradoxical uselessness, and holy subversion undertaken or imagined by stumbling disciples, graced fools, uncertain insuragents and other foot soldiers in the peacable revolution."

The article lists "acts" that call me back to the Gospel. "Hang out with the folks who will inherit the earth." and "Let your yes be yes." and "See how the lillies of the field grow." Except for the military references, this could be the job description of a Chaplain. I pasted it on my wall this year. One of the "acts" that I have circled, highlighted and pondered is this,

Become disinterested in numbers

And, I've taken this to heart. This has helped me learn to simply be. Allow the pager to direct my day (when I am on call) and allow the interruptions by families, patients, colleagues and staff to occur. This has not been an easy thing for me. One week, I took this feeling, this inner trigger that "someone's getting more calls than me!" to supervision and explored it. My supervisor guided me with this wisdom, "Pay attention to the relationships" and the "numbers" will take care of themselves. And they have.

Without too much strain, I've kept my "50 visits per week" covenant. Some weeks were more (highest = 107) and some weeks were less (lowest = 37), but on average I made about 60 visits. I've learned about not getting competitive. Some of my colleagues sweep all their floors every week - like around 80 or even 100 on average. Some have fewer visits - like around 30 or 40. And so, I refrain...

Become disinterested in numbers.

That being said, I have learned something by looking at my numbers for the year.

141 Deaths

79 Life-threatening Traumas

2,549 Pastoral Visits

59 Health Care Power of Attorney Assistances
28 Pharmacy Assistance interventions

60 Over-night "On Calls"

What does this tell me? One, that there is quite a bit of uncertainty in life. Two, that there is no shortage of human need. Three, I have much to be grateful for.

I have learned that:

• even after 141 deaths, there really is no pattern to how families grieve. Some are short (7 minutes) and some are long (3 hours plus). Some are emotionally draining and some are puzzling. All are as unique as fingerprints.
• while a gun shot wound is often cause for being in the trauma bay, it doesn't kill you. Bee stings might. Unhelmeted motorcycle accidents might. Being stabbed by your cousin might.
• even if I ask the patient some deeply thoughtful open-ended question, they may just want to know what time of day it is. They may just want to know that someone has fed their dog. They may just want to watch TV with someone.
• we don't make "magic mouthwash" in the pharmacy anymore. Most other prescriptions are very, very expensive.
• 60 on-call nights spent in the hospital means two months not spent at home.

Become disinterested in numbers.

I'm grateful for God. I'm grateful for the opportunity to learn from all 3,158 recorded visits and all the visits that were not recorded.

And they were on their knees, worshiping him. They returned to Jerusalem bursting with joy. They spent all their time in the Temple praising God. Yes. - Luke 24:52-53

The Long View

My colleague shared this prayer for Morning Report meditation.

She explained, she had been sad one afternoon, feeling a bit helpless from her recent pastoral care visit. (I know that feeling, I thought, it's pretty common around here.) Then someone shared this with her, she said, and it lightened her heart.

I, too, share this prayer here because it lightened my heart. It has since has been the source of not a few memorable conversations.

It Helps, Now And Then, To Step Back And Take A Long View

The kingdom is not only beyond our efforts,
it is even beyond our vision.

We accomplish in our lifetime only a tiny fraction
of the magnificent enterprise that is God’s work.
Nothing we do is complete, which is a way of saying
that the kingdom always lies beyond us.
No statement says all that could be said.
No prayer fully expresses our faith.
No confession brings perfection.
No pastoral visit brings wholeness.
No program accomplishes the church’s mission.
No set of goals and objectives includes everything.

This is what we are about.
We plant the seeds that one day will grow.
We water seeds already planted,
knowing that they hold future promise.

We lay foundations that will need further development.
We provide yeast that produces far beyond our capabilities.

We cannot do everything, and there is a sense of liberation
in realizing that. This enables us to do something,
and to do it very well. It may be incomplete,
but it is a beginning, a step along the way,
an opportunity for the Lord’s grace to enter and do the rest.

We may never see the end results, but that is the difference
between the master builder and the worker.

We are workers, not master builders; ministers, not messiahs.
We are prophets of a future not our own.
Amen.

By Archbishop Oscar Romero, a human rights activist from El Salvador in the 1970s

How are you taking the long view in this moment?

Accountability

One of my learning goals this quarter is to connect more deeply with staff. "Be careful what you pray for!" I hear ringing in my ears.

One of my favorite unit secretaries is now asking me to help her with scripture passages. That's funny - she's asking me? Perhaps that's why I'm on her floor - to meet her in scripture discussions.

It's really humbling (or humiliating?), though. Usually I can't understand her for her accent, or for the the din of the fax/copier humming and the constant beeping of monitors exclaiming that infusions are complete or heart rates of patients have exceeded pre-set limits. Besides all that, I also usually don't understand the meaning of her question.

The other day she asked me about Lazarus. Was Lazarus in Luke 16, the one in the parable about the rich man, the same one that Jesus raised from the dead in John 11? And was that the same Lazarus who sup'd with Martha and Mary, who anointed Jesus in John 12? In true CPE fashion, I attempted to divert the question and try to understand her side of these teachings. I am pretty sure that she saw right through me. Argh.

Now, after this Lazarus question, she has begun asking me about Jonah. (Isn't that the guy and the fish?) So it is a constant facing of this, my favorite unit secretary, that is challenging me to "get to know the staff."

Now I realize that she's my favorite BECAUSE she challenges me. BECAUSE she asks the questions. BECAUSE she is in conversation with me. She's tough. And I love her.
"Instead of claiming to know what God says, ask questions of one another, such as 'How do we understand God in this?' But don't go around pretending to know it all, saying 'God told me this...God told me that....' I don't want to hear it anymore. Only the person I authorize speaks for me. Otherwise, my Message gets twisted, the Message of the living God-of-the-Angel-Armies. - Jeremiah 23:35-36 (The Message)

Who might be holding you accountable in this moment?

Sacred Subversions More

thank you for right and wrong
and all the grace and good in between.
we are lost and found.

we are blind and can to nothing but see.
more lord
more

oh holy dissonance
and also with you
oh heavenly doubt
amen

do my motives matter?

Sing lord your
on-again servant
is listening


- - from the back/inside cover of Conspire Magazine's Summer 2009 publication, vol. 1, number 3
www.conspiremagazine.com

Sacred Subversions

These people have been turning the whole world upside down! Acts 17:6

I heard every siren call -
the skinny ones with their promise of beauty.
The chubby ones and their assurance of success.
The ones in suits and the ones who wear silk.
I was tempted, sure - I was repulsed
each voice, each note
the truth and nothing like the truth.
I tied myself to the journey and sailed into the song-
a passage of good hope;
a pirate with all my teeth

My soul magnifies the Lord
but what of the rest of me?

i went in the closet and closed the door.
i begged to have eyes to see and ears to hear
thy kingdom come

yesterday I managed to oppress no one
the food I ate was grown by my own hands
i wove my clothes out of dog hair and
trash from a Mexican trash heap
i read by the light of the moon - went to
jail to stop a war - cried at the foot of the cross
built a widow a house
taught a child to read
painted a picture using mud, blood,
and guns I had coaxed
out of the hands of
15-year-olds and ground into
a paste.

yesterday i forgave my mother and raised chickens
and then I rode my bike to Palestine
where I listened to bombs drop
and cried while I held a child who asked my why
It was a light day

We are the body -
the hands that serve
the voice that soothes

in every breath
it is an impossible situation
press your finger anywhere on the globe
and it is an impossible situation
organize thousands of women
dressed in white to crush a dictator;
feed every one
inspire everyone
sow your clothes and your food
pick up arms or put them down
and still it is
an impossible situation

luckily we are foolish
enough to show up anyway
today I'll run away with the carnival
and learn to juggle the revolution and quiet adoration

today for the kingdom today for the kingdom
may those who labor give birth
may those who long for life, grow

o jesus
o holy jester
focus our vision

- from the inside cover of Conspire Magazine's Summer 2009 publication, vol. 1, number 3
www.conspiremagazine.com