Wiped Out

July 26, 2009
How does God do this?

One page per waking hour, it averaged. Yesterday's "on call" was a record for me. What was the hardest part? Leaving the hospital in the morning.

As I attended to the family of the fifth death that shift, my colleague who was "up next" joined me in conversation with the oldest son of the deceased. I was relieved that he could take over, even though I had befriended the family members. I had "kept it together" since early morning the previous day and as I walked out of the hospital, that final good bye to my colleague brought me to tears.

I was wiped out and cried for the next hour. So much pain. So many deaths. So many lamentations.

How does God do this? I asked myself rhetorically.

I think God weeps with me. In every moment.